To The Girl Who Owns My Heart

My heart is fragile, precious and frail.

One taste of you was honey sweet, not stale.

Staring into your eyes hypnotized me; I was under your control.

Accepting to be my best friend played such a vital role.

Starting as friends, then best, then lovers galore.

I knew from the start that I wanted to be more.

You’re different than anyone I dated before you.

Unlike the others, you don’t just say something, but you put effort in; you actually do.

The path diverges on two different roads.

One is my past, the one I most loathe.

The other, however, goes on forever.

I believe it’s my future, with you and I ending up together.

Supportive, caring, always there when I need you.

I’m so in love with you, like you don’t have a clue.

The words that I speak are merely not enough,

Baby, I’m in love with your personality and lust.

I’m not just in it for sexual desires.

I’m in it for the hope that someday I’ll acquire…

I’ll acquire your love, your mind, body and soul.

I’ll acquire the strategies you used to make me feel whole.

I’ll acquire a spacious house on the beautiful West Coast.

I’ll acquire a picture of when we have our grand wedding toast.

I’ll acquire the joy of bringing home our first rescue pup.

I’ll acquire the patience of putting our first Christmas tree up.

I’ll acquire a wife, and a honeymoon in Hawaii.

I’ll acquire the sun on my pale skin as we tan by the beautiful, bright blue sea.

I’ll acquire the excitement of bringing home our first child.

I’ll acquire what it’s like for mom and dad to meet their first grandchild.

I truly can not wait to grow old with you in my life.

Most importantly, I can’t wait to get down on one knee and make you my wife.

It’s a team effort baby, so nothing will come easy.

Especially since a majority of my wedding vow will be pretty cheesy.

You’re the only woman I see myself with in the future.

You’re going to be an amazing surgeon; I mean, you already fixed my broken heart with your impeccable suture.

I got real lucky that I found you in time.

If I didn’t meet you when I did, I would’ve committed an awful crime.

I would have still been in a relationship, unhappy as hell.

But now, with you? Man, I’m doing real swell.

It’s Black Friday now, by the time I write this.

I just wanted to thank you for everything; wish I could’ve done it with a kiss.

1,326 miles are currently standing between us.

If I could do it, I’d take the next, incoming bus.

Thank you for constantly making the effort I’ve always dreamt of.

I’m so grateful to have met you; You really are my true love.

I’m grateful to have met you, and your family tambien.

I can’t wait to see you the day before Christmas; I’ll sure as hell see you then.

You’re currently snoring on the other side of my video screen.

I love falling asleep with you, my beautiful, precious queen.

I’ll end this for now, but wait until the third.

I’ll continue it then, with many more words.

Te amo mi amor; J’taime; I love you.

My lioness, my dinosaur: We’re the perfect two.

You’ll read this in the morning, so I hope you slept well.

I couldn’t sleep much; I was too busy falling under your spell.

Mesmerized, in love, forever I will be.

Hey love, I’m going to brew some water. Would you like some tea?

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Tension Rises

At first, it was a simple little “How are you today?”

Now it’s turned into begging you to come and stay.

Words were never spoken, but the truth is finally out.

We’re still in denial, but I know it without a doubt.

Be brave; Speak aloud, what’s running through our minds.

Admit the way you feel, that this whole time you’ve been blind.

Better than the Lakers, what a great team we both make?

If all is revealed, our reputations could be at stake.

“I’m confused”, you’ll say, until we both share a kiss.

Goodbye friend-zone, damn, that’s something I won’t miss.

Your soft lips touch mine, dancing with joy.

The moment you realize you no longer like boys.

Let’s tango in the moonlight as the kisses begin to deepen

Hold me while we count sheep together: 8…9…10…

What a wonderful dream that could have come true.

If it weren’t for society always judging you.

Don’t leave us alone, we’ll tick and we’ll tock.

Knock knock: The order of tensions are back in stock.

Seduced by one look; I know you feel it too.

Sexual tensions rise high; What are we supposed to do?

 

 

My Father.

Just writing my current thoughts on what I felt like when I found out my father has been cheating on my mother for over a year now. A lot of people get bullied in school. I was bullied by my own father. Fat, lazy, going nowhere in life, dyke, fag, retard… The list goes on, but never let anyone treat you like that. You have a voice of your own, and if someone tries to talk down to you, you have just as much right to use your voice as the bully does. Stay strong to those going through similar or worse situations. You got this. Never give up.

He stands there smiling like he didn’t break our family apart

My mom blames herself, holding on to what’s left of her broken little heart

A family once solid, how could you do this to us?

You kept her a secret, yet you still look at us and cuss.

I thought you were my hero, my best friend, but guess not.

You ruined my mom and I, all because you thought the Colombian was hot.

You threatened our safety, the look of compassion in your eyes no more.

You won’t move out of the house, cause you said it’s all yours.

You called me a dyke, said I was a stupid fag.

You said my mom was good for nothing, but picking up a rag.

Manipulative, destructive, much worse than the Grinch.

Someone tell me it’s just a nightmare, please just give me a pinch.

You said crying is for pussies, guys who do it are weak

You have two different identities, it’s like hide and go seek.

You call blacks racist names, and say Hispanics are all “Spicks”

Yet you think you’re so perfect, Mr. White Supremisist.

You pay for her to stay loyal, why’re you so scared?

She was found in a prostitute park, but you don’t think you’re prepared.

Well, your secret is out and now everybody knows

What an awful human being you are, so you might as well just go.

Please leave my mom and I, we’re better off without you.

I get panic attacks every day, not knowing what you’re going to say or do.

One minute, you’re laughing at the Family Guy show

Then the next, you’re calling my mother a hoe.

You’re no longer my father, I lost all respect for you.

I‘ll never be like you, my birth father, who?

 

Indestructible: Excerpt from Chapter 1

“Things will be different soon. I’ll meet new people, stay out of drama, and be who I really am.” Saying that was one thing, but really, who can predict the future? Not everything you wish for or declare will come true. Life isn’t based off of Aladdin or Cinderella. You may wish upon a genie lamp, but high chances are that there’s no genie inside to grant your wish. You may find a glass slipper, but there’s no fairy godmother that will take you away from your chores, or your evil stepmother. This is the real world, meaning that not everything is what it seems, and fairy tale movies are simply a facade to cover up the struggles within reality.  

Let’s flashback to the beginning of high school. High school is portrayed as this new chance to be yourself. It’s supposed to be somewhere where people are beginning to get out of their middle school habits and preparing for their life after school, such as the armed forces, college, and so on. Maybe that’s how it was in other high schools, but most certainly not in mine. Fist fights broke out almost every week at my high school, but there were more fist fights than verbal fights. When verbal fights did break out, it was mostly through the internet. More than anything, there was the beginning of Formspring.me, a website where you can post anonymously about or toward people. It sort of reminds me of Gossip Girl with the anonymity and the bullying.

Lost

Looking into the forest, all I see is black

Where’d reality go? I need to snap back.

Searching and searching, but time is running out,

Look far ahead. What’s that all about?

I’m struggling everyday to get things right,

but my mentality can no longer put up a strong fight.

A deep breath, possibly two to calm me down

I look over to see them all wearing a gown.

Laughter fading out, falling into the pit.

Maybe I should just quit.